Me.Selina.Nikkie
Dress – Valley Girl  /  Shoes – No.1 Shoes  /  Belt – Pagani
(Weird how the belt is the same price as the shoes. lol)

Last night was a blast at Majoe’s birthday. I organized it… Well co-organized it with Kua Led and finally, I was happy with the outcome of the party. I like how the design turned out even if it wasn’t exactly what I wanted. But it happens all the time. There are times when good ideas never work. I did have a lot of fun last night and I’m proud of myself with what I did.

I’m not going on full details on what happened at the party. But I gotta mention the crazy as cake fight at the end of the party. And I’ll post photos when I get them then hopefully the photos will show you the fun we all had last night. That was the best part of organizing an event – seeing the invited people how much fun they were having. The stress, the troubles and the problems were paid off by just the thank you and seeing the smiles on people’s faces. And the fact that they’re staying a bit longer just because they still don’t want to go.

People say I should be an event organizer. I answer, I don’t like the stress it’s giving me. I need a team with me and money to support this. But somehow, event organizing is my way of fulfilling my love for film because I imagine the event as to how it will appear in a film. It never occured to me to be an event organizer just because when I was a kid, I don’t make parties because I’m scared people won’t show up. It’s very embarassing when I wanted a huge as party and no one shows up. So i never make parties. I do have parties but only random ones like we’ll just think about going to our place and just have a pool party. That I know is going to be small but at least it’s not the embarassing type.

Event organizing is so much work and it takes ages of planning! But I’m surprised that friends actually asks me to help organize their party. It always starts with asking me if I could design the event and turns out, the people I help really needs help with not just the design but the whole thing. I love to help out, really! And I don’t know where all these event ideas are coming from but it’s coming out. It must have been because of too much Hollywood in my head. The parties, award shows, premieres, after parties, launches, fashion shows… I love to party. And luckily when I was growing up, I was able to go to different parties and events of my parents. And my grandma does a lot of parties as well. And also my mom organize events so I get tips from her. Just tips! That’s probably where I get ideas. The social life of my grandma! I swear, if we were in orange county, california or upper east side, manhattan, our family won’t miss all the charities and benefit events and stuff the rich family goes to coz of my grandma. She’s very sociable!

Anyway, so yeah… I’m still not thinking about going on professional events organizer. I’ll still fulfill my dreams of becoming an interior designer and actress before having events organizer as a sideline. But who knows? I might be infected by the family disease where we don’t actually do the career of the degree we finished. Events organizer… Only if it’s in Hollywood!

Photos coming soon! And also, a big shout out to God for being with me last night. Parties are million times better when God is with you and you share it with Him!

Want a translation? The title is “Mahirap Magmahal ng Syota ng Iba” which means it’s hard to love someone else’s. Just loving this version… ok and the song! Lol geehh my bro’s going to tease me hard out. Enjoy the vid and music! The song’s originally by Apo Hiking Society.

He came to camp, actually. The guy… And I was pretty much waiting for him to come… He came kind of late… And from the moment he walked in the camp site, I knew we’re just friends. I asked God to help me out and show it to me on camp. Well, He did answer my prayer. I’m good friends with this guy, though. So I didn’t tell him, and the question of whether or not I should tell him is not bothering me anymore…

Though, camp introduced another drama that I pretty much don’t wanna think and talk about it for now.

Waah, I miss camp and I can’t believe I didn’t put any blog about it… A photo is worth a thousand words.. and I have 1000+ photos… awesome aye?? but yeah

Well, anyway… to the main business. I was going through websites and stumble upon my friend’s site. (Oh please do visit even if you’re not a fan coz he deserve the hits!) And I saw Enchong and Erich’s (oh I’m a huge fan of Erich, though… Mainly coz she’s cute.) new movie trailer. The movie’s called “Paano ko Sasabihin” and the title itself captured me. I can’t fully relate to the entire story, but the message it brings does.

“Paano kung di ka nya naririnig?”
What if he can’t hear you?

“Paano kung pagod ka na magpanggap?”
What if you’re tired of pretending?

“Paano mo sasabihin?”
How are you going to admit it?

Ugghh… Exactly the questions I wanted answered!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Seriously… I just couldn’t help but watch the trailer and all. I’m actually curious what’s it all about. Well, I know the obvious: they both thought the other was deaf but truth is, they’re not. But I know there’s something behind it. I want to watch and MAYBE find the answer.

It has been weeks I’ve asked the question “How am I going to say I like a guy when he obviously couldn’t see me.” And yes, it is connected to my previous post, Oh Boy. The same guy who I have felt something different. I admit, I’m not yet sure if there’s something more than attraction. But whatever. I have camp to tell me if there really is something different about this guy. And I know it’s going to be more confusing if there’s something going to happen at camp, which I hope I will survive.

Oh God, help!

Music: United State of Pop 2009 (Blame it on the Pop)… I’m not exactly listening to this, but I’m currently obsessing. Lol.

Anyway, I won’t blog about camp til it’s actually here. I’m blogging about something real personal… So here goes.

I’ll start with a question: What would you do when you like someone and he only sees you as a friend? One person told me, I shouldn’t waste my time over this person. And a few others encouraged me to admit it to him. The thing is, both do have a point.

The first one. True, why would I really waste my time over someone who I’ve hinted a million times and still couldn’t see or realize that I like him. But how will I know that he really likes me as just friends if I wouldn’t tell him, right? Which brings us to the point of the second answer.

Uggh.. It just upsets me that I am stuck in the middle of two things that makes sense. If one doesn’t, feel free to leave a comment.

Maybe I should tell you something about our friendship. Simply comfortable. Out of all the guys I liked (and admitted to myself), he’s the only one I’m comfortable with. Usually when I know I have a crush on someone, I normally start panicking inside and boom, no talking. I go on shy, quiet mode around the person. But with ‘him’, I’m still being Auie: crazy, blah and random. I pretty much open to him and I open up to him sometimes. I couldn’t fully open up because I’m not sure if he wants to listen to my dramas. Lol… but yeah, he’s far out different from all of the guys I liked. And yes, I have admitted to myself that I like him… Twice I’ve said to myself I’ll stop liking him. Twice I liked him again. I wanted to stop, listen to my friend who said I shouldn’t waste my time and I’m trying to.

I’m waiting for my last sign over at camp and see. If we’ve gone closer, I’ll tell him and it’s all or nothing. But at least I got it out of my chest. If nope, then I should better listen to the wiser one and let him be. It might be just attraction and not the real deal. But whatever, you might wanna argue. I can’t fully think coz my head is tired, so if you find the blog weird… It’s because my brain isn’t functioning well.

Looking forward to comments. If any would even read this.

Right now there are loads to tell so less the time… So wait up till i can get a chance to go online again. I’m so going to post everything…. Especially boi drama… JOKES

Lol.. I’m so excited for YFC Camp! Dudes and dudettes… COME!!!! April 9… exciting it’s my birthmonth AGAIN!! My bday’s going to be awesome again… hahahaha

After watching these movies, the best I’ve seen was Confessions of a Shopaholic. I know it’s been ten years since it came out.. er not literally.. but I just got the chance to see it. I might actually watch it over and over and wait for the next one to come out. I’m intrigued at the book and how it went in there. So yey! I’m not really good at all these review stuff but I just clearly love it. Number one coz it’s all about fashion! Damn… And I can’t help but remember my lovely cousin throughout the movie. If there’s someone out there who knows a lot about it, it’s my cousin.

Well, anyway… Aside from movie marathon-ing, I’ve been making myself busy with webdesigning. Keeping Vanessa-Hudgens.ORG alive and still try and make Mark-Salling.NET online. I’ve others in line but these are my priorities. I’m doing this to try and put my mind away from the fact that I’ll be waiting a YEAR to go back to school. I know. It’s a misery… and I’ll be very, very much unknown to the whole school thing once I get back. I do hope I’ll be so ready when that day comes. Soooooo…. fingers crossed for a year!

Happy New Year friends!! Looking forward to 2010!

Music: none

I was sleeping so deep when I felt a little conscious as if I woke up. Maybe I did, maybe I didn’t. Then suddenly the feel of the room changed. It felt weird. Like really dark. Then he, Kamatayan, just showed up in my room from the door as if he entered through it.

The door didn’t open and close, he just showed up there. He slowly went towards my bed and then when I saw his face (hooded and like the scary movie type guy but only a little scarier), he was lifting his long ax thing and from there the blinking started as if in movies to create tension. I was moaning but it was hard to make up a sound. I was trying to ask for help but didn’t work. And then i forced myself to open my eyes and wake up. Thankfully I woke up. Who knows what could have happened if I didn’t?

So that’s the latest nightmare I had. I’ve had about 4 already and I’m hoping it will all stop now since the house had been blessed already. I spent the whole time praying and that worked. So… Yeah..

The picture above is not exactly the one I saw. But I like the photo so I used it to add a photo in the post. Credits to the owner. I just found it in google though.

Music: Other Side of the Door by Taylor Swift