Archives for category: Personal

kamatayanWanna know how it feels like to be visited by Kamatayan during your sleep? Don’t ever wish it. It’s not pleasant. I was visited by Kamatayan once in my sleep. It was so scary, I didn’t know what to do but pray. I was hoping not see a dead person lying next to me, and thankfully it didn’t happen. Maaaan it was freaking-scary… This is what happened:

I was sleeping so deep when I felt a little conscious as if I woke up. Maybe I did, maybe I didn’t. Then suddenly the feel of the room changed. It felt weird. Like really dark. Then he, Kamatayan, just showed up in my room from the door as if he entered through it. (more…)

New Haircut
Photograph by Josine. Spoof Shirt. Gold clock necklace from Ira.

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love… love is something develops through time.

… love is something you shouldn’t persuade your heart to feel.

… love is something that comes in the right time.

… love is something that takes a while before you see it.

… love is something you won’t be able to force.

… love is something that comes in the unexpected way.

… love is there.

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At our house before going to Ira’s [12.02.09]

I’m at Ira’s place at the moment having our sleepover since for like a year now! Hahaha, a dear friend of ours just got back from Australia and it’s cool seeing him again. I missed John sooooo much…

Well, at this moment, I was just looking through facebook not really knowing what to do. I should be sleeping by now since I have to wake up at 8 coz I’m going uni hopping with Ivy and Majoe tomorrow! Err more like later since it’s 2am.

Well yeah, we’re going vic and massey tomorrow since we will go inquire about CUP and courses for next yr. I’m still wishing for permanent residency for Christmas so HOPEFULLY we get it coz i really want to go to school

Oh and speaking of Christmas, check this out:

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This pretty much my good news two weeks ago when I received an email from Talent Scouts. It’s so cool they considered my application and will be representing me. This is sooooooo super exciting. Friends congratulated… others I know just didn’t bother. So I won’t bother venting here coz I’m excited! I’m having my portfolio photoshoot this saturday and I can’t wait to have the experience. It’s so cool! Sharing pictures might be hard, though, since it’s copyrighted. Hehehe…

Also, not long ago… It was Friday last week (dad’s birthday) I had an audition for Toi Whakaari. I spent the whole time trying to stay focused and keeping my heart rate to normal since I felt like it’s going to fall anytime. I was the last to audition, which means there were 6 other people who auditioned that I had to watch before I had a go. I think I spent the entire time plotting ways on how I can run out of that door and not do it. Thankfully, my feet stayed on the ground and I was able to audition. It was cool when I was doing it. I thought I wouldn’t be able to do it, but I’m proud that I did it. Even if I won’t get in, I’m proud to be able to do the audition. It was my first ever audition, which is why it was a huge deal for me. And what’s great about it, I also met new people. You see, God doesn’t really want us to give things up, especially when we know we love it. And He sprinkles a few more extras on the way.

Well, that night was Angelo’s surprise birthday party. I’m sure you’re very surprised. But I wasn’t able to come, so Angelo, if you’re reading the blog, sorry wasn’t able to come on your 21st. Happy Late Birthday, though! I’m so glad to have you as a friend ;) Thanks for everything and enjoy your 21st year. It’s not that bad ;)

Guess what I discovered today! Well, doing absolutely NOTHING can be absolutely tiring. Since I don’t go to school yet and I don’t have a job, I just stay in my room curled up in my bed thinking. And all I think about is just some random things like what would it be like to be in school, to study, to be in LA, my future plans that will probably never going to happen, people’s relationships, celebrity couples, what to eat, what to do, where is who, and all other random stuff that could enter my mind and seriously, it’s not healthy. I find it really stressful.

What I hate about too much thinking is that you get to find out things that are really, really frustrating. Right now, for the past months, I have realized how much I have missed so many things by not going to school. I mean, for example, three years ago, I graduated from high school in the Philippines and going to college is the next step. Taking a break from that is not a bad idea. But taking a break from it for 3 years definitely wasn’t the best idea there is. I feel like I don’t know anything anymore. It’s just one of the many things I realized that was pretty frustrating and I am not in the mood to list them all out. It’s.. err frustrating.

I’d rather feel physically exhausted than mentally exhausted. It means that you’re body is working out when you are physically tired. But mentally tired? Means you’re thinking too much and not taking a break. But how can I when I’ve got nothing to distract my mind. I need something to distract my mind. I’m not sure if jogging/walking would be good, since it’s also one of the times you get to think. I’ve already fixed the house, so no reason to do it again. HMM… or maybe I’ll fix my room instead. Err Whatever. I need something to distract me. Like study, maybe? Like get ready for school? ARGGG I’m thinking way too much again! Websites don’t even distract me anymore! This is sooooooooo stupid!!

Anyway, if you can suggest things to do that is not making websites, getting a job and going to school, please do share. I’d appreciate that

Music: I Won’t Disagree by Kate Voegele
^^ I love this song! It’s so me right now. It’s what I feel towards.. err him

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You know what they say about religion and science always contradict each other? Well, most of the time. You know why? Because science usually just focus on the facts and the reason why it’s this and that. But hey, after I attended the YFC leader’s meeting (I was just there to crash btw) on June 17, my views on science changed and I was wowed.

How well do you know your DNA? Or your inner body parts or whatever? I know I don’t know anything about biology. Heck, I even failed my sophomore year science. Except genetics, by the way. It was the easiest but I actually forgot it now. But there’s this one small tini-tiny protein cell in the body that I will never ever forget… As in EVER…

So that night in the YFC meeting, Met* led the meeting and showed us a video “How Great is our God”. Louie Giglio compared the earth to a size of a golf ball and showed the universe. You know how we viewed the earth as real huge? And the sun even bigger? Compare it to the other stars in the sky. Err.. I’m not going through that, actually. We all know how big the universe is and how genius God is in creating the universe.

What I’m here to let you know is the small parts of our body. Like the DNA or something… It’s a protein that makes up all your our organs (thanks to my sis for that by the way). Basically, it the protein that’s part of a structure that binds cells together to make tissue, and tissues makes organs… (thanks to my sis again… okay i’m not really sure of what I’m talking about scientifically… but the point is it’s a protein that “HOLDS THE BODY TOGETHER”.)

You know how we get all lonely and sad all the time? We feel torn apart because we don’t know what to do. We feel like there’s nothing else to do but give up. And sometimes we would go “Why is this happening, Lord?”… “Are you trying to make me suffer?” or something like that and we feel like being torn apart. But think about this next few things I’m going to say. The laminin… it’s awesome. It’s described as the protein that holds the body together. Scientifically, it binds cells that forms tissues that forms organs that forms your body whatever… Get the picture? But hey… it’s that small protein that binds everything together to hold your body.

Okay… I’m not making sense anymore, right? What’s so cool about laminin? It’s just a protein.. Well……. wait till you see how it’s diagramed by clicking here and here and here for the actual. You may think that it may just be a coincidence, but hey… it’s the sign of God. The protein that holds our body together, is the sign of God. How great is that? A million small crosses hold our body together are spread inside our body. Think of it as God is inside us to hold us together.

So point is, even if you feel so down and you think there’s nothing else in life. God is in you all the time. It may not be the laminin that will solve your problems, but just think that God’s in you no matter what. Literally or not. He will always be there to put you together and be strong. Enjoy!

This makes more sense, though: WATCH IT! It’ll blew you away

Music: None but I’d say No Longer I is the best song to be listening while reading/writing this one. It’s a song composed by YFC Wellington Music Min aka GEPC

*Name changed.

I HEART JACK SPARROW!!!

This means two things actually… But most Filis would understand why I love J.Sparrow. One meaning is because… duhhhh who doesn’t like Johnny Depp?! He’s funny, cool, awesome, great actor… and face it, guys, he’s hott. But there’s also another meaning why I love Jack Sparrow. Oh not just him but as well as William Turner, Bill Turner, Davie Jones or whatever his first name is, and a whole lot more pirates in the Pirates of the Carribean. I love these movies! It’s soooo cool. I want to be able to be in a movie like this. Anyway… back to the 2nd point why I love them…

I have Photoshop CS4 now!!! and I’m loving it… waaaahhhhh… Next up… Dreamweaver CS4! :P Enjoy

Music: None… dunno why my iTunes is a mess up. I can’t put on my music coz it’s being a mess.